Enter the World 1: Remixed!
by The Chronicler
Summary: While you are awaiting my next chapter (which is coming), enjoy this revamped version of the other chapters!
1. boom!

_**Disclaimer: You already know this crap, so let's get it on already!!!!!!!**_

_1st chapter: Destination: Fowl Manor_

**_We zoom to get a close-up of Fowl Manor._**

**_We closely zoom into Arty's window._**

**_We see Arty doin' his stuff on his laptop (mainly hacking and such), but one major difference._**

**_He's in a wheelchair!_**

**_Suddenly he decides he's actually tired and decides to go for a walk...er, stroll through the gardens._**

Artemis: Butler! Butler, where are you?

**_In walks a tired and totally beat Butler_**

Butler: (sighs) Yes, Artemis?

Artemis: Is it okay if you roll me outside? My hands are cramped beyond reasoning.

Butler: Of course I will.

**_He does what he is asked to do._**

Butler: Do you need me through the garden?

Artemis: No, methinks I can handle my self through the yard.

Butler: No, after your parent's death I swore to myself that I'd never let you out of my sight again.

_**Seeing his fear of his death within his faithful friend's eyes, he decides to let him come along.**_

_**As he is rolling himself through the garden, he asks Butler a question.**_

Artemis: Do you think that the People have forgotten us?

Butler grins and recounts memories of their three unusual, but unforgettable adventures.

Butler: I seriously doubt that, but I think you're on their good side currently.

**_But as he was saying this, we see through a sniper-scope aimed directly Arty's head._**

Killer: For the Prophets...

From a distance: Aw, fuck... (Crack!)

**_The sound obviously catches A & B's attention and manages to distract the sniper for a few seconds._**

**_The guys go check on where the noise came from, and as the sniper packs up his stuff to follow Art and complete his mission, he is immediately shot in the head by Dante's "Niteshade" rifle._**

Dante: Bye, Bye!

**_A & B go check on the origin of the noise and they find the "corpse" of a young man about Art's age (13)._**

**_The young man looked strange. He was pale with a pointy nose. His hair was slicked back and rather black. But his most noticeable feature was the Sash around his right eye that had the Anarchy symbol on it._**

Damien: Goddamn, that hurts like a bitch!

**_Suddenly, an exceptionally pale youth with dark with white streaks hair, Adrian Brody nose,and an eye patch with the JtHM symbol on his left eye appeared out of nowhere from the shadows._**

**_And finally, the General of the gang, Liz, a dark-haired girl withahoulder-length hairtook a long drag from a cigarette, jumped down from a nearby tree and then made a sigh._**

Artemis: Something tells me that this is going to be an interesting day.

TO BE CONTINUE...


	2. Alternate Realities

**Chapter 2 Proper Introductions**

**_Artemis is sitting in his wheelchair with a rather suspicious expression upon his face._**

Artemis: (In a rather suspicious tone) Who sent you? Koboi? Spiro?

Liz: One, We don't work for either of those people.

Damien: Don't even fucking know who they are.

Liz: And second, we're not here to kill you.

Damien: We could if we wanted to…

Artemis still has a rather suspicious expression on his face.

Liz: …And I think it's probably best to know why we're here first.

**_Artemis glares at them, not sure whether these are friends or assassins sent to kill him again._**

Liz takes a drag on her cigarette, and begins.

Liz: We're here from a sort of 'alternate reality', so to speak. Our superior sent us here to take care of a certain problem that your 'reality' has. Pretty much there's some kind of an "emergency that will require our "services".

Artemis: That "Emergency" being?

Liz: (Sighs) Are you Artemis Fowl II?

Artemis: Affirmative.

Liz: And do you know a Commander Holly Short?

Artemis: Yes, but how do you know her?

Liz: Um… We have our sources, you could say.

Artemis: (Questioningly) Can I know what?

Damien: Ok.

Artemis: Seriously?

Damien: Fuck no, you crippled dumbfuck!

Artemis: All right, tell me what you're doing here or I'll have Butler take care of you.

**_Butler, standing by his side, cracks his knuckles threateningly._**

Liz: In the words of the "great" Marshall Mathers, 'Let's get down to business'…

Damien: …I don't got time to mess, what is this, looks like the circus's in town, let's shut this….

**_He then gets shot point blank by Liz's crossbow._**

Liz: Anyways…

**_She takes out a PDA, types some stuff in it, then gives it to Artemis to read…_**

_Mission Statement:_

_Destroy Prophet of Ohm society_

_Eliminate Commander Short_

_Eliminate what was 'Foaly'_

_**So peoples, how do you like the remix so far? As one would say, R R.**_

_**Stay tuned,**_

_**The Chronicler**_


	3. Thank god for dumb blonds

Notes from The Chronicler: Greetings, readers. This is the "Remix" as I call it of my story. Some of you may ask why I would do a revamped version of my story? To some the answer is obvious. The original story was serious bullshit. The fact that I tried to do everything within a week was a bad Idea to the max. Everything was disorganized and all-over-the-place (unless, of course you're into that kind of stuff). Well anyways, this here is… Chapter 2 Pwetty Pwease? 

**_Artemis reads the info and has a slight look of surprise._**

Artemis: Holly and Foaly?

Liz: We had a source that said you knew these two.

Artemis: We were… allies, as you would say.

Damien: Important thing is you know these bitches.

Artemis: Yes I… (Looks at Damien) Weren't you supposed to be dead a minute ago?

Damien: Oh, yeah… (Notes the Bolt (Crossbow Ammo) stuck in his head) Let me try… (He yanks on it until he pops it out) GODDAMN!

Liz: Don't ask…

Artemis: Well, anyways, why do you have to involve me?

Damien: Good question, But I don't care!

Liz: We're not quite sure ourselves, but our superiors sent us here, and this is where we're stuck until we do our job.

Damien: Also, we need a place to work at for a while, so…

Artemis: Of course.

Damien: Real… you fucker.

Artemis: Well unfortunately I just can't help you… name?

Liz: (raises her cigarette holding hand) Liz here, Damien there…

Damien: (flips him the double deuce)

Liz: And that there's Dante.

Dante: (Waves with his arms) Hi…

**_Just then a voice is heard off screen._**

Guess who: Artsy! Where've you been?

Damien: Artsy?

_**Just then Juliet comes along.**_

Juliet: Hey there, Artsy Fartsy, where've you been (Hugs our permanently seated (and currently blushing) character from the back)?

Damien: (Several seconds of stony silence, then…) Mwa, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha! Oh, my fucking god… (Snaps out of laughter with an idea. He then nudges Dante.)

Dante: Mmm… OK! (He suddenly pulls a Bambi Eyes (or Bambi Eye, in his case) trick)

Juliet: Aww, how cute.

Damien: So can we stay over, PLEASE?

**_Artemis realizes that he has been deadlocked with Juliet with a pouting face on._**

Artemis: Why not…

Damien: Fuck, yeah! (Under his breath) Thank you, blond idiot girl.

Artemis: But we only have one Master Bedroom.

Liz: I'll share with Damien, thanks a lot.

Damien: You sure, boss? I don't give a shit sleeping on the couch…

Liz: Yes I'm sure. Now let's just prepare our shit, ok?

**_Dante has a questioning look on his face and points to himself._**

Julie: (Hugs Dante) Don't worry, you can stay in MY room for the night, ok?

Dante has a tear coming out of his one visible eye while he's being dragged upstairs to Juliet's room.

**NEXT CHAPTER: NIGHTTIME ANTICS.**


End file.
